Commitment, Career, Compromise....

If you find the love of your life, you commit yourself to the one you love. You start living in a world which is full of dreams, weaved around the one you want to live the rest of your life. But, there are dreams which you have been dreaming much before the love of your life entered in your life and those dreams are yet to be fulfilled.

Love comes with commitment, commitment to be there with your loved one, Commitment to share everything including dreams. So what about the dreams that do not include your love of life? Dreams that can only be materialized by constant determination to succeed, which require time, hard work and single track mindset. Are those dreams needed to be compromised just because you think that they cannot be achieved with your other dreams that include your love of life.

The career, which also requires commitment and is absolutely essential to realize all the other personal commitments; Career and Dreams are two different path that merges together when your career is same as your dream. But mostly your career and dreams are of different type and you need to balance your time between your career and towards pursuit of happiness.

Life becomes miserable when your career demands more than what you are giving it, and your love also wants validation of your commitments (e.g. marriage, or moving in together) and then your dreams seems to be fading away between your commitment and career. The priority of commitment becomes the highest and of dreams become lowest.

So what to do now? How not to compromise your Dreams for Commitment and Career? I am desperate for an answer....

Nine Eleven 2009

Its been eight years when America came under attack this very day, the twin tower, the symbol of wealth and power came down like a deck of cards. I clearly remember the day that changed the history. The mayhem, the cries, the desperation and the anger associated with that moment.

Eight years have passed and from America under attack to War on Terror, lots of things happened that shaped our modern history. From being anti Islamic, extremism and radicalism to a new US president whose name has Hussein in it. I'm not going to write anything about eight years of war, politics and terrorism as I hate all of these, instead, I am exploring the effect of time on the people that were feeling the pain more personally than anyone.

The first is New York Fire Department, it lost more than 300 brave fire fighters in a single day! Those who got survived were unable to cope with the emotional loss and trauma. One of the fireman in New York fire department broke after reading the list of fireman died in that attack. He said that he couldn't believe that almost all of his best pals and buddies are no more with him. Suddenly, they became hero, whenever and wherever they put off the fire, they had been photographed and admired and honored. Still, it took time to fire department to fill all the vacant jobs as no one was willing to join it afraid of death and calamity. As time passed, things got settled down, they are definitely heroes but now treated like common men and the department have to no longer search for appropriate people for the jobs.

The other people are those who had no option but work in the twin tower locality of Manhattan. They were the closest witnesses of the loss and the pain. There life was going to get changed post 9/11 when they began it where they left on 9/11. The Doctors, the Investment Bankers, the Consultants and the Engineers, all were afraid of doing their job in the vicinity of the remains of the twin tower. Fear of being killed by an aircraft or a missile and the haunting images of that sad day made their life and work miserable. But, as time (the greatest healer) passed they tend to get back to normal routine and now must be feeling safe and secure of living near the tallest building to be build in America

The final ones are those people who feared most of their lives and dreams, that is the American Muslims. The only fault of was their name that made them suspects. There are thousands of stories of trauma and pain that they had gone through over a period of time for being a Muslim. Times are changing, and surely they must be feeling more secure today than ever before.

9/11 has touched each one of us at some level, but its affects are going to be their on the lives of many more years to come. Lets hope that we all act rationally and logically to heal the wounds of past.

The Bad, The Ugly, The Murugun

After reading Aamir's take on Quick Gun Murugun, I went to see the movie with high hope of having a great good time. But, to be very frank, I didnt like it at all! I know that its not necesaary that something my idol likes will also suit me. But I was dissappointed, as my expectations were too high.

Its not that Quick Gun Murugun is a bad movie, its a different movie that I didn't like. It started with a promising note but then went on to become a drag for me. More than half the movie is in Tamil, which was a shocker as in its poster it says, English. Then same old Rajinikant style repetitive action sequence seem to get boring! It has some witty moments but overall it was too much of a drag for me.

Watch it if you are willing to enter the theater with no expectation, light mind and heart!

Does being a Chameleon is better than being a Copy-Cat?

Since the start of our great school days, we have been asked to read our study books and learn by heart, all the answers to the questions asked. We have been asked to memorize Hindi and English Poems, Science Questions, Chemical and Mathematical formulas and many more useless things word by word such that if you made any minor slip while writing the answers, you deserve to get less marks. We study, learn and apply it in our life.

Are great thinkers, innovators and visionaries became the great without reading and learning. The answer is no, so a creative person is born with a creative mind?

Its quite strange that while interviewing someone, we expect to get the same answer to the question, which we have learn by rote from the candidate, and if, the candidate gives us an alternative answer, we usually reject the one immediately

Few days back, I wrote a post on a political controversy, It was an interesting subject, and to learn more about it, I read lots of blog post and news. I also quoted and included few lines from other post, and, surprisingly someone I know, called me and questioned its authenticity in terms of writing. I did not feel hurt as someone was questioning my viewpoint, but it was an uneasy feeling that made me question about plagiarism, quoting that has been written. If I would have changed and rephrased the sentences keeping their meaning same, then all those views would have become mine?

After all, we read something, quote it, analyze it and then accept it in our thought process. If by changing few words those ideas and beliefs becomes ours, then I would definitely disagree with one of my dear friends opinion. After all, what we absorb is what we become.

Something you create is an inference to already existing thing or idea.

Next, time if someone solve some problem in a way which is different from what you have read, try to give one the full marks.... I can't... Do you?

Quick Gun Murugun, Mind it!

While browsing through Aamir Khan ( my favourite Bollywood actor and moviemaker ), I saw his latest post ( august 23, 09 ) in which he mention about a comedy flick named Quick Gun Murugun which he had watched recently.

In his blog he says "Just saw 'QUICK GUN MURUGAN'. Really enjoyed it. I think fans of the Channel 'V' character Quick Gun Murugan will love it. Its got so many rib cracking moments. And a very well pitched performance by the lead actor Dr Rajendra Prasad, and all the other cast. Its releasing on 28th so dont miss it if you are a Quick Gun fan."

I am a huge Aamir fan, and I believe whatever he says! So, I am going to watch it on the very first day, and will try to post my review.

Quick Gun Murugun is a comedy film directed by Shashanka Ghosh who earlier directed Waisa Bhi Hota hai Part 2.

To Jinnah with love, from Jaswant

I can understand the fascination of senior BJP leaders ( first Advani now Jaswant Singh) for Jinnah, as its impossible to believe that a cognac drinking and pork eating Muslim can become the demon that divided the country in the name of religion.

It can be impossible to accept the fact that India is divided by a man who opposed the Congress’s Khilafat agitation as he believed that it was endorsing Islamic religious bigotry. How come a modern, English speaking can be the sole reason for Pakistan existence whose Urdu was so bad that as one saying goes that when he once declared "Pakistan Zindabad!" he said it in such an anglicized way that most people thought he was saying "Pakistan's in the bag!"

How come he allowed his daughter and her daughter’s son to stay back in India, in spite of all the hatred and communal violence? There are many instances of Mahomedali Jinnahbhai life that makes him a westernized liberal Muslim, which must have fascinated Mr. Jaswant Singh to explore Jinnah’s true contribution to the great Indian partition.

It is not a new perspective of the events that led to the division of India, earlier also many noted academicians and writers (including Maulana Azad) have written about it in the similar line of what Jaswant Singh had.

What amazed me the time that Mr. Jaswant Singh deliberately chose to publish his research; at a time when BJP is going with its identity crisis, was hitting on the core BJP ideology is Jaswant’s way from becoming a senior marginalized party member to a revolutionist? Definitely, Mr. Jaswant Singh was aware of the consequence, otherwise he would not have reacted lightly. Was he thinking that an intellectual view cannot be seen as a blow to BJP ideology, as Mr. Advani, BJP's top shot have already been condoned of praising Jinnah as a secular leader in 2005.

It’s also sad to see that Jaswant Singh expulsion was finally signed and approved by Mr. Advani who himself once praised Jinnah as a secular leader. What is now making BJP warlike against one of its founder member who had served many cabinet minister ranks during the NDA days? Was it easy to kick out him as he made a view against the ideology base at which BJP sits as here is no one to support him in the BJP, after all he is a rootless politician, who had to move from the deserts of Rajasthan to the distant hills of Darjeeling for Lok Sabha rehabilitation.

I have not read Mr. Jaswant Singh's new book but who read and dissected it says that Jaswant Singh's book on Jinnah is a little over 650 pages. None of the 20 odd members who comprise the BJP's think tank at the party's chintan baithak have read the book cover to cover. Had they read the fine print, they might have realized that the book is more a critique of the role of the Congress leadership during partition, doesn't eulogies Jinnah, nor does it castigate the BJP's new poster boy Sardar Patel.

One thing is for sure after telephonic expulsion of Jaswant Singh from BJP is that the party is going through an identity crisis and is desperate to establish its hardcore hindutva ideology, for which there seems to be no takers.

I am not here to support Jinnah or BJP, because as a young, educated and ambitious modern Indian I cannot be bring to boil on Hindutva as the Karsewaks and Sants of early nineties. I am sure most of the India’s youth is now focused on his career, dreams and life rather than BJP ideology of Hindutva. Whether Jinnah did it or not, it’s a history and let it be part of discussion of academicians and historians.

No Strings Attached!

Last week, I watched "Love Aaj Kal", a Bollywood movie that speaks about the meaning of love to our generation and how much it’s different to the love in sixties (1960-1969). At the core it talks about the journey of love, from realization to grand finale.

In the film, a modern, carrier focused and ambitious couple decides to break their relationship as they needed to focus on their carrier and dreams. They move to different continents after throwing a break-up party to their friends. As they settle into their new life, they tend to realize their love for each other, and eventually end up together after lots and twist and turns in a truly Bollywood style.

Is it really hard to get out of a relationship? In this film, they tried to make it easy by throwing up break-up party, then kissing good-bye forever, hoping for not see each other again. But, they made one big silly mistake; they kept talking to each other on phone, without a break, about everything. Come on! You have to be missing someone to make so many long distance international calls. It’s so stupid to first break-up and then start talking about everything in life over a phone or using INTERNET. This makes one more attached to ones ex instead of out of one’s mind and heart.

Lets face it, if you are breaking up with someone, you need to cut all your lines that connect you to your ex, otherwise you will never get out of it one hundred percent. It’s strange that our ultra modern and career centric generation takes love as a fast food, you have to just eat it fast and move it back to your life, which of course is not true. One has to face the bitter truth someday.

Suppose, that the couple of "Love Aaj Kal" decides to part their ways 20 years back when there was no cell phone and no internet, they would have had no strings attached to their break-up, and they would have lived happily ever after, far away from each other.

So, if you want to end, end it with no strings attached. :-)

Brothers Commitment!

Rakshabandhan aka the bond of protection is a Hindu festival marked by the tying of a Rakhi, or holy thread by the sister on the wrist of her brother. The brother in return offers a gift to his sister and vows to protect and look after her.

In my school days, Rakshabandhan would bring fear in the eyes of all cupids struck innocent teen, the fear of becoming Rakhi brother to the first love of his life. What happen if ones first crush think oneself as her Rakhi brother? What if someone has leaked my tender desires to the girl I love and to prove herself innocent she would come to me with a Rakhi. Also, there were girls madly in love with someone who sits in a adjacent row (my schooling was done under the watchful eye of famous Indian co-education system where a class room is divided into two mutually exclusive co-existing area based upon the gender or sex), feared that, Is he going to come with a Rakhi? and request her to tie her on his hand.

We really enjoyed making fun of our so called stupid friends, spreading rumors of someone intentions of tying Rakhi to the someone, the fear of those foolish eyes, the sadness of so called newly made Rakhi brothers and sisters, their bravado to accept the fate in front of bunch of jerks. No one ever dared to deny the request to become ones Rakhi brother or sister.

This was a scenario of a typical small city Kendriya Vidyalya, fifteen years back, in which I spent my wonder years. It was strange, yet true, that in our Co-Ed school, you can make friends only of your same sex. It was, you can say unaccepted, to have a close friend of an opposite sex. A friend to a girl can be a girl only and vice versa for boys. But, you can have a deviation if you became a Rakhi brother, it’s like a commitment from brothers side to the girls social circle that my intentions are pure and my love is brotherly.

It can look like a joke, but still these so called commitments from Rakhi brothers still part of our great Indian small town which constitutes more than eighty percent of our city population. I am not here to judge our society or culture but, can relationship between a girl and a boy be only limited to brother or non-brother.

Strange but true, still, if we see a girl hanging out with a boy, and we get to know somehow that, the boy is not her brother, we always smile at our intelligence and think "hmmmm... kuch to chakkar hai"( Something fishy is going around). Can a girl and a boy can never be best of best friends?

I have seen so called modern liberals doubting on a friendship of a boy and a girl, so, it’s only brothers commitment which is pure and genuine, and rest is JUNK.

It’s not about being ultra cool and modern; it’s about our mindset, which needs to get cleaned. Until and unless we are not able to accept the fact that a boy and a girl can be good friends or buddies without getting romantically and sexually involved, we cannot overcome this so called jinx.

Out Of Sight, Out Of Mind?

Somethings that are not in our direct view or cannot be seen by our eyes get less important over a period of time........

Is it true that long distance relationships and the people that goes far away from you, are going to get out of your mind sooner or later?

Its been five years since I have started working for the same company. In the last five years many people came and left my team...and to my surprise.... at present I am not in a regular touch with any of those so called professional buddies, but there are a few, to whom I refused to get out of my mind as they were more than just professional buddies to me.

Five years ago, my life changed when I moved from a small old city to the buzz place, during the course of time I made friends, lost friends, missed my family, missed my pet, went to diiferent places of world where I coudn't have imagined to go when I was leaving my roots. But, my family, my pet and my dear friends were never gone out of my mind, as they literally were out of my sight

So, there are people who are part of your work/activity/routines (the replacables) and, there are also, the one who are part of your life e.g. best friend and your loved ones (the irreplacables).

Irreplacable never goes out of your mind even if they are out of your sight, but, replacable gets out of your mind as soon as you begin to write a new page of your life.

Breaktime Over!!!

Its been almost six months since my last post! A lot of things happened during that period. I got sick, almost broke my leg and had a roller coaster trip to Japan. I know its an excuse, but I didn't get time to express myself on my blog. The blog which I started with a dream of learning how to express myself, how to let the world know what I am thinking and above all, to make some effort to test my dreams.

Lots of things to say, lots of thing to learn and its never to late, so, here I am making a resolution to write again.

All the best to me, :-)